It’s crazy that I even thought of writing this while here I am in the middle of packing my things. I don’t know why, but the thought just popped up, and this is me typing fast hoping to put into words the thoughts that just tapped me a while ago.
I’m headed for an 8-day vacation at Cebu and Bohol in three days and all I have with me is a carry on bag and my pouch. Of course it’s not impossible to actually just use a carry on for an 8-day stay.
Thinking about it, I can actually liken this trip to adulthood. I do not claim that I am a pro at doing this “adult-ing” but a handful of experiences and lessons, both first-hand and those you learn from others, can actually help you get through the hard, trying times because you become aware that you are not the only one who has had these feels and thoughts and changes. That at some point, our lives is just as fucked up as others. And I believe knowing that you are not the only one, helps you breathe a little easier for a moment. So here we go.
Rhymes with how I feel just about everytime Life gives her not-so-fun surprises and you just go: Yes, what a fucking life. But let’s not get overly anxious about it, we surely have days like that but we also have days where we love life so much we don’t want to die yet.
And just like going through adulthood, opting to just have a carry on bag for a week stay is just as scary. It was a challenge for me, it was like taking a big leap in life generally. Taking the leap is scary but I learned that fearing won’t take you nowhere further than where you are at the moment. Growing up, we face moments where we have to make that big decision for a dream or yourself, for family or people around you, and maybe, even for your personal relationship. I have NEVER traveled anywhere with just a carry on bag. I believe it’s impossible. Because I believe that I have a lot of things that I will need or I want to have with me, the reason why I have thoughts that I can never put up with just a 7 kg bag for a week travel. I’m actually used to just stashing everything want to bring on my bags and voila! I don’t care about what things I won’t get to use. Even my solo trips on the past months, I was always with a backpack and a big tote bag.
But then here I am I took the challenge, I’m testing my limits. I learned too, that fears can’t kill me, but it could kill the experience.
So yes, I said to myself, I will endure and try.
Packing was the hardest part, I had to choose wisely what to bring and what I won’t. I had to painstakingly plan what I would wear for every day and night. I had to fold my clothes nicely so my bag won’t buldge and of course if in case I short of anything to wear, I will just wash my clothes. I learned to organize my things and pay attention to the necessary things; just like how at growing up, we come to realize the things that matter, people that we’d like to keep.
We prioritize the things worth our time and attention, truth is I learned to ignore the unnecessary burdens that would haunt me mentally, I learned to not dwell on things that I don’t want in my life. I learned that as we grow old it’s fitting to say that it is necessary that at some point, you cut the ties with people who do not have your best interest at heart. I mean why bother yourself with the hate and spite when you can just let them go and be at peace.
We let go of our intense attachments to worldly things and people, knowing that they can be temporary then we pick the ones that are worth travelling with. There are things that we leave behind knowing you can get them later on, or maybe you just don’t really need it for the leap ahead. For a carry on bag to be less than or exactly 7 kg is spot on with the thought that we can take the leap with a lesser baggage as to what you are used to having. That leaving things behind isn’t so bad at all. It doesn’t mean that you don’t need it, maybe you are just leaving them behind because you know you actually can have access to them on your destination. For example, soap and hair products and some other toiletries. I chose to leave them at home since I know I can just buy them there. Just like when you come to a point where you have to loosen your ties with some people you used to be so close with. You are not cutting your ties to them completely, you just loose it to move further, to grow broader. You know that maybe you two maybe not be speaking to each other but someday when everything actually had gone to their rightful places you’ll just laugh how tough growing up had been for the two of you.
But it’s not just people. For one to actually take a leap with lesser baggage, we also can opt to leave some of our old ways, maybe some of our old thoughts and views too. We open ourselves to the possibility of discovery and further growth and satisfaction when we let go of other things.
I too had to pick ahead what to wear on the airport for I’d rather pick using the heavier shoes than it be added on my carry-on bag weight. For I learned that if you want to bring something you can wear that is too heavy for carrying, then wear it. Like if you no longer can carry the heavy feeling you have, carry it; cry or share your problem to an eager ear who would listen to your whims.
And truly, the destination doesn’t really matter, what you learn at the journey is what counts as THE ADVENTURE.
PS. ANG DAMI KO NANAMANG NASABI